Paternal Peer Review of Charlie Sheen's Maternal Analysis

In a recent analysis, Charlie Sheen drew a sharp distinction between the maternal accomplishments of his ex-wives, Brook Mueller and Denise Richards.  His assessment makes clear that he regards Mueller as the more accomplished of the two (though confusingly, comparing her to a class of musician often associated with mind-altering substances and irreparable hearing loss by the age of 30). In fact, his critique of Richards went so far as to categorize her as an an ungulate who not only engages in religious heresy, but whose best days are clearly behind her.  Whether the last portion was in regards to her abilities as a mother or an actress was not made clear by the rather vague, but scathing review.

OHD Paternal Peer Review Findings

We found Sheen's review to be broad and overly vague.  In addition to this, the nomenclature used may even leave some to doubt whether this review was little more than a cleverly-disguised insult towards Dennie Richards.  However, being the Sheen fans that we've been for 30+ years now, we are incredulous toward the notion that he would treat the mother of his children with such low regard.

As Sheen's review is broad and overly vague, we choose not to publish his analysis in its entirety until he addresses the concerns outlined above.  Once corrected, he can resubmit for paternal peer review.  Should this be asking too much, he can perhaps have his review published in an irresponsible  conspiracy theory factory posing as a scientific journal (for example, Natural News).